Silly things happen in life. You spill your coffee into your lap heading to work. Someone lets you know you have a “bat in the cave.” You trip for no reason at all and look back as if something caused it. Your cat watches you go to the bathroom.
It also happens on a national scale. Steve Harvey incorrectly announces Miss Universe. The Oscar was almost given to the wrong movie. Donald Trump. A video goes viral of your cat watching you go to the bathroom.
In a similar vein, here is the first “All-Louisiana” baseball ranking of 2017! Where number one might always be a surprise and everyone should stop taking themselves so seriously. So, get ready, Angry E-mail Guy. Here we go.
#1 University of New Orleans Privateers (9-4)
That’s right. It’s the Privateers’ world and you’re just visiting. UNO takes the top spot with a solid start and the big W versus the big boys from Baton Rouge. It’s nothing short of a superhero movie so far for UNO. Speaking of short superheroes, Tom Cruise is also number one. Number one in my heart. You can add up the awesomeness of every other action hero and it would pale to the glory that is Tom Cruise. And Tom Cruise doesn’t need to star in any superhero movie. He’s in one…every single day.
#2 LSU Tigers (9-4)
Same record as UNO but played against 1000 percent stiffer competition. Whatever. LSU is the overdog that we all know will be there in the end, as long as they can get some relief pitching. Right now, they’re like the Death Star — all of that fire power, yet somehow no one realizes the rebels know their weakness. Which was evidently all explained in the last “Star Wars” movie, but I missed it because I always have to have a 60-ounce Coca-Cola.
#3 Louisiana Tech Bulldogs (12-1)
The dogs from Ruston are sporting a shiny record to start the season. Once again they knocked off the ranked Arkansas Razorbacks. The media outlets are starting to buzz about this team, who also beat Mississippi State this week. I look at their schedule and think…north Louisiana is a long, long way from New Orleans. Which might be why they haven’t played anyone from Louisiana yet — because they actually are from Arkansas (cue horror movie sounds). Trippy, I know.
#4 McNeese State Cowboys (9-4)
“Raising Arizona” is one of my favorite comedies of all time. Not that I would mention that around this Cowboys program, since of their four losses this season, all four came at the hands of the Arizona Wildcats. The Pokes have beaten everyone else, including this week’s 5-4 victory over LSU in front of a record-setting home crowd at “the Jeaux.” A game in which McNeese took the lead via the coolest way possible — Squeeze Bunt! Awesome.
#5 Nicholls State University (7-5)
And you thought UL-Lafayette was going to be here. Nope. Thibodeaux is in the house, son! The Kerns knocked off the Ragin’ Cajuns 3-1 and held their own in losses to Houston and LSU. It’s a pretty heady start for Nicholls and good for them and their one fan.
#6 UL-Lafayette Ragin’ Cajuns (6-4)
Just like last year, I’m waiting for the Cajuns to explode. This team has all the talent in the world, yet somehow won’t grab their schedule by the jugular. ULL fumbled and bumbled to a respectable 43-21 season last year, a season that ended with two straight losses to the Arizona Wildcats. And what did Arizona go on to do? They went all the way to Omaha, losing to Coastal Carolina in the national championship. The Ragin’ Cajuns are so close to going Tom Cruise.
#7 Southeastern Louisiana Lions (8-4)
The Lions thankfully beat West Virginia, a team that is total garbage and should have suspensions coming its way. Anyway! Next up for the Lions is the “Pontchartrain Bowl” — a series this weekend versus UNO whose trophy looks like something you would find in your grandma’s house. Impressive start for the Lions, who now own victories over Tulane, South Alabama and a series win over Rice.
#8 Tulane Green Wave (3-8)
You know ‘em, you love ‘em — ladies and gents, the Tulane Green Wave. For some reason the opening scene of Fear and Loathing comes to mind. You know, the one where they might be lost in the desert and strange things happen? Sure, Tulane might be better than some of these teams ahead of them, but I’m old school. Tough love rules apply. Tulane really needs to sweep the rest of the series versus San Diego this weekend.
#9 Northwestern State Demons (4-8)
“Diner” (the movie). “Purple Rain” (the album and movie). Kingpin (the bar). Walking up St. Charles to Yulman Stadium. Glitter shoes. “Star Wars” movies. Chicken wings (all of them). I love all of these things. Just like I love this school naming itself the “Demons”.
#10 Grambling State Tigers (5-8)
Grambling has had a pretty solid start to the season. They lost a pair to Oklahoma but represented fairly well. More importantly, they dropped a series to Arkansas Pine-Bluff, a team they’re expected to contend with for the SWAC West. Congrats to the athletic department for putting together a very strong schedule that has the Tigers facing six probable NCAA tournament teams.
#11 UL-Monroe Warhawks (4-10)
Love the name and these guys may have pulled off the biggest opening game upset this year when they shocked Dallas Baptist 8-3. So, it’s sort of like a war movie in reverse, but the good guys win in the beginning. After that? Straight pummeling by the enemy.
#12 Southern University Jaguars (1-7)
You know I root for the underdogs. So, I’ve got nothing but love for these guys in the lower half of the rankings. They’re not unlike that stunt guy that actually gets to speak a line or two. You sort of like him, but you know in the end, Tom Cruise is making him go night-night. The Jags host Grambling this weekend, go check it out if you’re in the BR.
COLLEGE BASEBALL RULES!
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