You’ve got two left feet — but, thankfully, so does he. Awkwardly, that’s how you met: at a wedding where neither of you wanted to cut the rug, let alone join everyone else on the dance floor. Instead, you shrugged, giggled, chatted in a corner and bonded over the fact that both of you hate to dance. You’d tried ballroom dancing classes and failed. He’d spent years tripping over the tango. Within an hour, you’d admitted to one another that you preferred repartee to the samba and listening to music rather than dancing to it. Could we call it: love at first conversation?
So, once you decided to marry, no way were you going to do a first dance in front of a crowd—or even consider having the most important night of your life revolve around hours of dancing to music so loud it could drown out confabulation with friends and family. You wanted a “no dance” reception, where music still played a role.
You worried though — would that disappoint your guests? After all, these days most people associate weddings with a raucous dance floor. In the end, you realized that you could absolutely keep music as an instrumental (pun intended) part of the event — after all, this is New Orleans —, without turning the whole fête into a dance party. So, you agreed: no boogeying down or cha cha cha-ing in a formal way. Music would happen but not be subsumed by dance fever. That said, you wouldn’t dream of stopping someone from tapping their feet or succumbing to a twirl. And, if somebody — anybody — happened to start a conga line or do the Macarena, you just might join in, left feet and all.
Ideas For Having a Dance-Free FÊte
Rest assured. Dancing is not prerequisite to a successful and memorable reception. Even without a dance floor, live music establishes a mood, but it doesn’t have to be the centerpiece. If conversations between friends and family are what you’re after, keep the musical volume understated, which allows people to converse. For this sort of wedding, consider your venue carefully. Look for outlets with stellar acoustics, places that can accommodate soft or atmospheric music, but also allow for normal conversations. Gardens, art galleries, boutique hotels, bar buyouts, small theaters and presidential suites are great options for this sort of party.
If you want music to star at your wedding reception — though not in a dance band way —, hire a strolling minstrel strumming a guitar or a feisty saxophone player jazzing it up as people swill cocktails before dinner.
Alternatively, offer up an intimate, seated concert—perhaps something with chamber music vibes, maybe a recital thrummed by a string quartet. Keep in mind: You don’t have to make a dance-free wedding formal or fancy. Choose what you like. Bring on the raging rockstar, indie or folk music — even an uplifting gospel choir.
Musical Things to Do
Karaoke! You can kit up a karaoke stage to make singing and vocals the forefront of your wedding fun. This activity works best after a sit-down dinner or in the case of a lively, buffet cocktail reception. Get the fun started with a few extroverted friends who love to croon a tune, then let the participation-style entertainment set a tone of revelry and feistiness. After everyone’s grabbed the mike and had a chance to sing their favorite song, switch the game to music trivia. Guests can form teams or participate individually to name that tune. This is a perfect mainstay for smaller receptions and mixed-age group parties.
For dance-leery couples who nevertheless love music and are keen to ensure guests have plenty to do, set up music-focused stations around the reception area. The activities can be enjoyed between courses or at various stages of the afternoon or evening event.
Create a cozy vinyl listening nook, where guests can pick and play records or offer up a cozy corner to build personal playlists. These can sit alongside a photo booth with a music theme. Some couples have reported the success of a silent listening lounge (great for introverts who need some space), complete with headphones and bridal party-curated playlists. It provides a place for those so inclined to groove to their own beat.
A digital jukebox with a plethora of options puts guests in charge of the party’s vibe. It’s especially ideal for transitions or downtime. Know a lot of musician friends who’ll be attending the soirêe? Set up pianos or a slew of instruments from guitars to flutes for guests to perform impromptu concerts on a stage. You can also decorate the tables with maracas, tambourines, bells, recorders or other handheld percussion and music makers, so all the guests can join in.
For an afternoon reception or hen party, consider pairing live music with a painting class, lawn games, board game stations, wine tasting or cooking demonstrations. Music played as an accompaniment to fireworks, stargazing or light shows makes for a grand finale for any party. Popular scores include: “A Sky Full of Stars” by Coldplay, “Levels” by Avicii or “Time” by Hans Zimmer, depending on the effect you seek or the music you like.
Use songs or acoustical soundtracks to build momentum for each stage of your event and to signal endings and beginnings.
Remember, nobody comes to a wedding to dance. They come to celebrate you, dance shoes optional.
