Kirill Sokolov’s “They Will Kill You” is an action movie a la pastiche; a patchwork quilt of tropes, overt references, plot lines, and blatantly ripped-off jokes from some of the greatest films ever made in the genre. That is not damnable on its face. It’s a trite but useful adage that “Good Artists Borrow, Great Artists Steal”, though tellingly, there isn’t a third part of that phrase that says “The Best Artists Shamelessly Copy”. A demonic cult/samurai style action blood bath that somehow misses the mark of generating anything innovative from either, the failing of “They Will Kill You” is not the performances, which are largely good and committed, the production design, which is lush if a bit gaudy and lacking in grit, or the score, which is bombastic and triumphantly heralds a better movie than the one you are watching. No, the failing of the film comes down to a lack of imagination; a laurel resting short hand that believes by presenting a sequence that FEELS like an iconic scene from a better film, “They Will Kill You” might be granted grace and brownie points for the effort. Unfortunately for the film, moviegoers are more savvy than that and know snake oil when it’s being presented to them, especially when it’s gift-wrapped in the loose, vivisected flesh of beloved movies that came before.
“They Will Kill You” opens with two sisters, the older Asia (Zazie Beetz) and the younger Marie, as they flee their abusive father. He tracks them down, only to be shot by Asia, who abandons her sister in an attempt to escape the law and a life under the thumb of her abuser. Asia is caught and sent to prison, only to later learn that her sister has gone missing. Hiring a private detective, Asia discovers that Marie (Myha’la) escaped their stepfather and, after taking a job at a lush and exclusive apartment building in New York City, has gone missing. Fueled by a need to rectify abandoning Marie years before, Asia fakes her way into being hired at the building and is welcomed in as a new housemaid by building manager Lily (Patricia Arquette). The building is suspicious, though in no way subtle, given the devil-baas reliefs on the front door and a gigantic pentagram in the skylight. But Asia goes to sleep in her room anyway, only to have a trio of black-robed and pig-masked assailants enter her room. Whatever hapless victim they were expecting is not what they find, as Asia is not only capable of defending herself but is eager to do so. Using a hidden shotgun and machete, Asia carves through her attackers, leaving them decapitated, disemboweled, and left for dead before confronting Lily and revealing her desire to bring her sister home. Lily seems unfazed by the wanton carnage, and Asia is soon to understand why, as she watches her attackers impossibly heal themselves, with heads and limbs reattaching in real time. Lily explains that this building made a deal with Satan many decades ago, and the inhabitants retain immortality in exchange for the odd sacrifice every now and then. Asia is meant to be today’s sacrifice and, in turn, must die. Thus commences a run-and-gun slash fest between an increasingly bloodied Asia and reconstituting attackers while she searches not only for her sister, but a way out of this five-star Hell.
To call what makes up the text of “They Will Kill You” merely “influences” is a stretch, as the film can’t help but poorly reanimate a whole stack of loose parts and organs from films long past and present them as a walking, talking novelty. Just off the top of my head, movies ripped off by this film include: “Ready or Not”, “Die Hard”, “The Raid”, “Old Boy”, “Kill Bill Vol. 1”, “You’re Next”, “Heretic”, “Bad Times At The El Royale”, and any number of samurai films that I sadly cannot pinpoint precisely. Frankly, the only real moment of life in the film comes from a jankily animated eyeball that jitters and jolts its way after Asia in a particularly enjoyable bit of chase shenanigans, yet even that could be chalked up to the old “Neversoft” production company logo from “Tony Hawk Pro Skater”. The real ones know. The latest victim of the recent trend of theatrically released movies incapable of any single moment of ambiguity, “They Will Kill You,” is also rife with shoddily re-recorded dialogue and whole scenes where actors are either never seen to speak or whose lips never match what they are saying. The entire production screams desperation; to be taken seriously, to be iconic, to be a cult classic, to have a single interesting idea, to which it sadly falls flat. I take no joy in this pronouncement. Nothing pleases me more than a movie that takes a tired concept and flips it on its head, or takes something that might otherwise be trite and finds a way to make it interesting. Take, for example, “Ready or Not”, a fantastic film with a ridiculously silly premise. What if a Bride, the night of her wedding, is forced to play a murderous game of Hide and Seek with her in-laws, all of whom have signed their souls to the devil and must kill her before the sun rises or face bloody death themselves. A simple idea, yet what the filmmaking team of Radio Silence was able to mine from that base concept is something much deeper than a simple slash-em-up; excavating the contradictory impulses of a newly married person to show devotion to their spouse but also their family, something any married person has had to confront at one point or another. That all too relatable tug of war is the fire that burns white hot at the core of that film, not to mention the fact that it’s funny. Another thing that “They Will Kill You” fails to conjure is any real laughs, believing instead that the height of hilarity is a character calling another character “bitch”. But what should be expected from a movie devoid of intention or a single original idea, but an adolescent brand of humor and an eagerness to paint the walls red without ever pausing to wonder why an audience should care.
“They Will Kill You” is a film that is so desperate to be liked that it’s an insta-turn off; a derivative Tarantino rip-off that loses points for any interesting idea it might have, flaming axe fight or Satan manifesting in a decapitated pig’s head, by endlessly tripping over it’s own shoe laces to present other filmmakers work as their own special idea, with QT already does to an often nauesating degree. Bold of them to release this movie while the “Ready or Not” sequel is in theaters. If I were you, learn from my mistakes and check out what Radio Silence has up its sleeves this time; true filmmakers who, even in their failures, always put on a show that is fun, thrilling, and most importantly, wholly their own.
You’ll be glad you did.
“They Will Kill You” is playing at Prytania Theatres at Canal Place.
