Wediquette Wednesday: Does the mother of the groom usually help plan the wedding?

Each Wednesday, we tackle wedding etiquette. At times, it’s a reader question or one from a colleague, friend or family member and other times we’ll cover a popular issue. (Note: Questions may be edited for clarity and brevity.)


Question: My bride-to-be and her mom are in the first stages of planning our wedding. I’ve made myself available to help make decisions, go to tastings and essentially assist where needed, while at the same time, allowing them to steer the ship. This approach seems to be going well, and they clearly have everything under control, but lately I can tell my mom is feeling a little left out. Does the mother of the groom usually help plan the wedding? If so, should I ask them to include her in the process?

Answer: First, high five for being available and helping out, instead of checking out. Grooms are definitely getting much more involved in the planning process these days and it sounds like everyone has settled into roles that work well for the group. Second, it’s 100 percent natural for your mom to want to participate in the wedding! It’s also customary for the mother of the groom to pitch in and is a great way for everyone to get some bonding time. Mention to your fiancée and her mother that your mom has availed herself and would love to help out. Suggest that perhaps she can help assemble favors or, if she’s the organized type, ask them to consider having her help with the seating chart. That last one is always a bear of a job. Once you’ve put forth the idea, I’m sure they will come up with plenty of ways to bring your mom into the fold.


Do you have a solution to share or a wedding etiquette question? Respond in the comments or email



Save the date for our January Bridal Show, Jan. 10 at the Hyatt Regency New Orleans. Click here for tickets and more information



Digital Sponsors

Become a sponsor ...

Give the gift of a subscription ... exclusive 50% off

Limited time offer. New subscribers only.