Wediquette Wednesday: Is my divorced bridesmaid the matron of honor?

Each Wednesday, we tackle wedding etiquette. At times, it’s a reader question or one from a colleague, friend or family member and other times we’ll cover a popular issue. This week, we are sharing a question from Dee Lane’s advice column in the new Summer/Autumn 2016 issue of New Orleans Bride Magazine.

— Melanie Warner Spencer

Question:  I have asked one of my good friends who was married and now is divorced to lead my wedding party. What is the appropriate title for her? If she had never married, she would be a maid of honor. If she was married then the term would be matron of honor, which, by the way, I really dislike. What should I do?

Answer: Traditionally a maid of honor is a woman who has never been married, while a matron of honor is a married woman. In this case, the analogy is that just like a married woman went from a Miss to a Mrs., after divorce she becomes a Ms., but can never go back to being a Miss. After divorce she would be a matron of honor. However, you do have other options. First off you can ask her which she would prefer you use and go with her choice. Also, the term “honor attendant,” which used to only be used to highlight the sister or close relative of the bride, is now being used in place of maid of honor and matron of honor for those who don’t feel comfortable with either term.

TONIGHT’S THE NIGHT: The June 2016 New Orleans Magazine Bridal Show, 6 to 9 p.m., is tonight at the Hyatt Regency Hotel. Meet with the city’s premiere wedding industry professionals and plan every aspect of your Big Day from the engagement to the honeymoon and everything between! Click here for advance tickets and additional information. 

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