Each Wednesday, we tackle wedding etiquette. At times, it’s a reader question or one from a colleague, friend or family member and other times we’ll cover a popular issue. This week, we are sharing a question about the appropriate age of a flower girl from Dee Lane’s column in the Winter/Spring 2016 issue of New Orleans Bride Magazine. — Melanie Warner Spencer
Question: I’m thrilled that my niece has asked both of my daughters to be flower girls in her wedding. They are very excited and my youngest, 7, can’t stop talking about the plans. However, my oldest is 11, and while she’s flattered to have a role, she feels she’s too old to have a “babyish” job, like a flower girl. Is there an age limit for flower girls? Is there a way to suggest that maybe my older daughter should be a junior bridesmaid instead?
Answer: The usual oldest age for a flower girl is 7, which means that your younger daughter is perfectly appropriate as one but your older daughter would, in matters of age, be more apt as a junior bridesmaid. A junior bridesmaid’s role is to dress similarity to the other bridesmaids and walk in the processional and recessional. She would not be expected to chip in for showers or bridesmaid’s gifts to the bride or attend the bachelorette party or other events more appropriate for older attendants. It is OK for you to reach out to the bride and ask her about this. However, if the bride prefers that your older daughter is a flower girl, and your daughter is amenable to that, it’s totally fine and no one will think anything of it.
Do you have a solution to share or a wedding etiquette question? Respond in the comments or email Melanie@MyNewOrleans.com.