Each Wednesday, we tackle wedding etiquette. At times, it’s a reader question or one from a colleague, friend or family member and other times we’ll cover a popular issue. (Note: Questions may be edited for clarity and brevity.)

Question: My fiancé and I are inviting several friends and family members to our wedding that we know won’t be able to attend due to budget, timing and health issues. We want to send the an invitation so that they feel included, but don’t want them to feel obligated to send presents. What can we do to let invitees who can’t come to the wedding know they don’t have to send a gift?

Answer: It’s so thoughtful of you to consider these factors. It is of course customary when you’ve received an invitation to a wedding to send a gift, even if you can’t attend for whatever reason. Either send the invitations and follow up via call, phone or text the recipients that, while you know they are unable to attend, you wanted to include them in the festivities in as many ways as possible, but for them not to feel obligated to send a gift. You can also indicate this in a note with the invitation.


Do you have a solution to share or a wedding etiquette question? Respond in the comments or email Melanie@MyNewOrleans.com.

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