Wediquette Wednesday: What if an R.S.V.P. doesn’t include a return date?

Each Wednesday, we tackle wedding etiquette. At times, it’s a reader question or one from a colleague, friend or family member and other times we’ll cover a popular issue. (Note: Questions may be edited for clarity and brevity.)

Question: What if an R.S.V.P. doesn’t include a return date?

Answer: First, a quick fun-fact that R.S.V.P. is an acronym for the French, répondez s’il vous plaît, (or in English, “please respond). Second, it’s always best to respond right away, whether there is a return date on the card or not. If you are offered a plus one or otherwise must check on work or another potential conflict, contact the couple as soon as possible to ask for a deadline. During that conversation, thank them for including you in their Big Day, explain that before sending your R.S.V.P. you wanted to double check a few commitments, and that a deadline will ensure that you get your response back to them in a timely fashion.  

(A version of this post ran as part of a Wediquette Week series in 2018.)

Do you have a solution to share or a wedding etiquette question? Email

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