Wediquette Wednesday: What if the invitation doesn’t include a response card?

Each Wednesday, we tackle wedding etiquette. At times, it’s a reader question or one from a colleague, friend or family member and other times we’ll cover a popular issue. (Note: Questions may be edited for clarity and brevity.)


Question: The invitation to my friend’s wedding came in the mail, and it calls for an R.S.V.P, but it didn’t include response card. What’s the proper way to respond?

Answer: According to Emily Post, the rule of thumb is to reply in writing or via email. Post recommends the following:

Formal Response: Written in the third person, this reply follows the wording of a formal invitation.

Mr. and Mrs. Harold McGowan

accept with pleasure

[or, regret that they are unable to accept]

your kind invitation for

Saturday, the nineteenth of June


Personal Note: Usually written to hosts you know well, a personal note should be brief but sincere.

Dear Ann and John,

Rob and I are delighted to accept your invitation to attend Margaret and Tom’s wedding on June nineteenth.

Yours sincerely,




Dear Agatha,

I am so sorry that I can’t join you and Max for your wedding. I have to be in Chicago on business, but you two will be first in my thoughts on your special day.

Love to you both,




Do you have a solution to share or a wedding etiquette question? Respond in the comments or email


Save the date for our June 2017 Bridal Show – June 7, Hyatt Regency New Orleans. Get your tickets and more information here.



Digital Sponsors

Become a sponsor ...