Each Wednesday, we tackle wedding etiquette. At times, it’s a reader question or one from a colleague, friend or family member and other times we’ll cover a popular issue. (Note: Questions may be edited for clarity and brevity.)


Question: My friend’s wedding is in two weeks. I blanked and forgot to R.S.V.P. and feel horrified about it. The card has been clipped to the refrigerator as a reminder and I still forgot! My husband and I have really been looking forward to the wedding and would still like to attend. When is it too late to R.S.V.P.?

Answer: As a rule, it’s best to R.S.V.P. right away or no later than three to four weeks prior to the wedding. Since that ship has sailed however, it’s time for damage control. First, call whomever in the couple you are closest to and tell her or him what happened. Honesty is always the best policy. Ask if they have given the final headcount to the caterer. That is generally the final deadline and is typically given a week prior to the wedding, so you should be OK. Second, tell the bride or groom that it’s fine if they’ve already given the final count and it’s too late. Apologize for missing the deadline and ask them if they would like to set up a double date after the fact so they can tell you all about the wedding. Be sure send your gift as soon as possible (before the wedding) along with a card wishing them a beautiful Big Day and a long and happy marriage.


Do you have a solution to share or a wedding etiquette question? Respond in the comments or email Melanie@MyNewOrleans.com.